🎸 Feeling Discouraged by Better Players? You’re Not Alone.
- ryanboisselle
- 12 minutes ago
- 4 min read
Why comparison hurts, and what to do instead
Let’s be real for a second.
Have you ever seen another guitarist play something so clean, so musical, so perfect……that it made you want to put your guitar down for good?
I have.
It’s one of the most disheartening feelings in the world — especially when you want to improve, and you are putting in the work, but suddenly it just feels… pointless.
But here’s what I’ve come to understand:
That feeling is part of the process.
In today's blog I want to share with you some tips to pull yourself out of this feeling when it comes up (because it 100% will in your journey), and how to manage it.
🧠 Why It Hits So Hard
Seeing someone “better” than you can be humbling — but can also feel devastating. Especially if:
You’ve been grinding and thought you were making progress
They’re your age (or younger!) and already crushing it
You start thinking, “What’s the point? I’ll never catch up.”
Suddenly all your excitement turns into doubt. Instead of being inspired, you feel small.
It’s easy to think, “They’re just naturally talented. ”Or worse, “Maybe I’m not cut out for this.”
📱 The Social Media Trap (and Why It Makes This Worse)
Maybe this is me showing my age a bit, but I really believe one of the hardest things about staying motivated these days is how we’re constantly bombarded with everyone else’s “end result” — especially on social media.
Let’s face it: as much as we say “Don’t compare yourself to others”, we’re wired to do exactly that. Comparison is how we learn. It’s how we figure out where we are, where we’re lacking, and what’s possible.
And in the right amount, it’s valuable. It's what pushes us.
But if you’re being forced to compare yourself with hundreds or thousands of players every single day, it’s too much. It becomes overwhelming. You stop learning and start spiraling.
That’s why I personally try to limit how much guitar content I consume — especially when I’m in a growth phase, just chipping away at something.
I know it might sound old-school… but honestly, it helps. Sometimes tuning out the noise is exactly what lets you keep going.
🎯 What You’re Seeing Is the Result — Not the Journey
Most of those players you’re comparing yourself to weren’t born like that. They’ve been practicing for years. Making mistakes. Starting over. Feeling stuck. You just didn’t see that part.
What you saw was the end product — the polished version, in performance mode.
You didn’t see:
The early practice room frustration
The wrong notes
The weeks where nothing felt right
The days they wanted to quit, too
And yes — they’ve been discouraged by other players before, just like you are now.
🛠 How to Shift Your Mindset
Instead of using someone else's playing as a reason to stop, try using it as a mirror:
What do I admire about their playing? (tone, timing, phrasing?)
What’s one small thing I can study or try to emulate?
What can I learn from this, instead of letting it crush me?
Most importantly: remember that you’re not in competition with anyone.
This isn’t a race. You’re building your own voice — at your own pace.
The only real goal is to keep going.
📈 Keep Showing Up
I’ll be honest — I’ve had moments in my journey where I seriously considered giving up. (That’s a story for another time.) But every time, something reminded me that I didn’t start playing guitar to be the best. I started because I loved it.
And I still do.
If you’re feeling discouraged right now, take a breath. You’re allowed to feel that way. But don’t let it stop you.
The players you admire? They kept going. And so will you.
🌱 Trust the Process
Growth doesn’t happen all at once. Sometimes it feels invisible — like nothing’s changing even though you’re practicing. Other times, something suddenly clicks and you surprise yourself.
Both are part of the process.
You don’t have to feel inspired every single day. You just have to keep showing up — especially on the days when progress feels slow.
The truth is, most breakthroughs come quietly. They don’t always feel like big “wins.”
Sometimes they just show up later, in a gig, a jam, or a solo where you suddenly realize: “Hey… that actually sounded good.”
Keep stacking those days. They matter more than you think.
✨ Need Some Guidance?
I work with a lot of students who feel overwhelmed — especially in the early stages. It’s easy to get lost in comparison or self-doubt, but I can help you find a clear path forward.
Because I know how discouraging those moments can feel, motivation is one of my top priorities as a teacher.
I still remember the times my own teachers and mentors gave me the encouragement I needed to keep going — and I try to pass that on in every lesson.
We’ll build your playing step by step — focusing on what you want to sound like, not what someone else is doing.
You’ve got something worth developing. Let’s keep you moving forward — one step, one phrase, one day at a time. 🎸
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